I want to begin by reminding everyone (again) that the Christ Church worship service tomorrow has been moved in both place and time. We were originally scheduled to be at the Kibbie Dome at 10 am, and we have moved the services to be at the Logos Field House at 9 am. There is a saying in the Navy that “five percent never get the word,” and we are trying to beat that. We sent out an email to all who have registered for the conference, announced it at church last Sunday, and I posted that info here earlier this week. But if any of you know anyone who has been on the road, without access to email, and who is going on the basis of the original conference brochure, please let them know. There should be signs on the door of the Kibbie, but unfortunately, with the change in time, the service will have already been underway when they read it. If anyone is confused, he can call the church office, and the recording has all the information needed.
I post the above because it is most necessary. We want to make sure that everyone who wants to worship with us gets there in time. But the following comments are offered because I don’t think I am ever going to get tired of talking about the Moscow Temperance Crusaderettes. The reason we moved the service was because of a complaint the UI received from our intolerista friends, who were afraid that if minors received Alcohol (albeit cleverly ensconced in sacramental wine, like in the Bible), they were afraid that an orgy might break out. I am not sure what they were afraid of, exactly, but it appears to have been concern that we were promoting an Animal House ethos under the guise of religion.
I am not sure about this, but I think that for their sacramental observances they must be using prune juice in some fashion. And although this practice is not to our taste, or conviction, we think that in a free country prim church ladies (even if the prim church ladies don’t have a church) should be able to partake of prune juice in accord with their convictions. This is for two reasons. The first is a matter of basic conviction — it is a question of religious liberty, and we Calvinists are all about religious liberty. Everywhere in history that Calvinism has gone, civil liberty has followed. Look at a map. Liberty of conscience is one of our cutest and most endearing children. A lot of people don’t care for the American Gothic appearance of the original Calvinist couple, but it has to be said the kids are darling.
But there is another reason, and this one is more pragmatic. The more prune juice our opponents take in, the more they will keep harassing us with tactics like this, tactics of High Pettiness. And people in the middle, watching all of it, have eyes that get rounder and rounder. “They did what?” I am not at this point yet, but pretty soon I should be able to say that I wish I had a dollar for every time I heard about someone with solid liberal credentials say something like, “You know that I don’t agree with all your stuff, but I think it is crazy what these people are trying to do to you all.” We are hearing more and more of this, and it is the direct result of our prissy censorious types trying to pretend they are open-minded and tolerant when all the while they are trying to manipulate and misrepresent laws and regulations for no other purpose than to give a hard time to people, for no other reason than that they differ. Diversity looks great at a distance, but these people freak when it actually gets close to them. And so every time they overplay their hand, this is a great blessing for us. More and more people look at their fastidious fundamentalism and say or think, “Jeepers.” And of course the causes behind them overplaying their hand are mysterious, but I attribute it to the prune juice.
One last comment and I am done. Some might think I am being too clever by half. “If it really is a help to you when these folks keep going over the top, then why would you write about it publicly, and say so. Won’t that just result in them backing off, thus hurting you?” No, not really. It doesn’t matter what I say. They can’t help it.
Remember, worship is at 9 am at the Logos Field House.