Eddie and Carrie

The book of Genesis, the book of beginnings, repays repeated visits. In this book we see, obviously, the beginning of the heavens and earth. But we also see the beginning of God’s ways with man—in His covenant dealings, in His establishment of work and vocation, and in His creation of marriage.

But when God creates marriage, He does not do so as an afterthought. It was not a random act, topping off a series of random acts. God, the ultimate architect, structured the world, and His creation of man and woman was the capstone of this very impressive work. Because this is so, we see that there are recurring patterns throughout the entire process that highlight His methods, and He does not set aside these methods when He gets to the creation of our first parents.

One of the first things we see is that God loves to unite by dividing. He creates our beautiful world by dividing the land from the sea. He creates our earth by dividing the waters below from the waters above. He made the earth fruitful by dividing the inanimate world from the animate world, bringing forth the latter out of the former. He placed the sun and moon in the sky, thus dividing the day from the night. God is not fragmenting the world, shattering it to pieces; rather, He is tying everything together in a Trinitarian complex, binding everything together by means of thoughtful division. This is not the kind of division that sin brought to our race—the division of malice and hostility, of relationships fragmenting. No. This is the division of fruitfulness.

The Lord created Adam out of the dust of the ground, and as Adam looked around he should have seen that he was the only thing that was undivided. Everything else that God had broken in two He had pronounced good. But Adam stood, solitary, alone, and unbroken, and God said that it was not good that man should be alone. And so God determined to complete him, and He did this by placing Adam into a profound deathsleep, and He then divided Him, taking a rib from his side. From that rib God fashioned the first woman, our mother Eve, or, as she was known to Adam, Ishah. God made the one into two in order, by His glorious wisdom, to restore them in a deeper and more fulfilling unity by making the two into one. If He had not made the one into two, He would not have been able to make the two into one.

We learn here that this pattern of dividing and reuniting in greater glory was not just an arbitrary trick or device that God happened to use here. When He divided man into two, creating mankind, constituting mankind and male and female both, He did this so that they might become one again. And being fashioned this way meant that they bore His image. And when they became one again, what was the intended result? The point was to be fruitful.

A lazy pragmatist might think that God was just traveling in a circle. Why not just stay right here to begin with? Why not leave the rib where it was? The answer is in that word fruitfulness. The union that Adam had with his rib initially would not have populated anything. The later union with his wife has resulted in an astonishing multiplication of a race—billions thus far, and hundreds here in this sanctuary. This is God’s way. He takes something in His hands, He blesses it, breaks it, and the result is life for the world. This pattern was disrupted by sin, but sin has not overcome it or erased it. Even when the Lord Jesus was on the eve of His betrayal, He still followed this same pattern. He took the bread that was His body, blessed it, and broke it. And in that breaking, we who were scattered all over the world in countless little pieces were gathered back into Christ. By bring this kind of fruitful division, the division of sacrifice, to one, the many are made one. He was broken so that we who were broken might be made whole.

This is God’s way, and He knows what He is doing. Eddie and Carrie, He continues to follow this same pattern, and He is present with us now, and He is doing the very same thing right this minute. He is taking your old unmarried life in His hands right now, He has blessed it, and then in just a few moments He will break each of you in two in order that He might make the two of you into one.

Why would He do this? He does this because He wants the aroma of love and sacrifice to fill all the rooms of your new home together. When the woman came and anointed the feet of the Lord Jesus with her tears and perfume, the aroma of what she had done filled the room. In the same way, the aroma of what you are doing here today is to fill all the rooms of your lives, and will fill it with the glory that comes when you surrender yourself to be given away. Both of you are to do this, and never forget that God established this pattern as a blessing. This is not marital asceticism; this is marital glory. This ceremony is breaking the jar of perfume.

Eddie, you are called to set the pattern down; you are called to establish this as the rule and custom of your home. God has already done it in the way he created us, but because of sin and widespread disregard for what He has said about it, we have to pay particular attention to this. God calls the husband to take the initiative in sacrifice and self-giving. This is not because you are to do everything while Carrie watches, but rather because you are dancing with her, and so you are the one who must request the privilege of the dance. The one who takes the initiative in and for the dance is not dancing any more than his partner—he simply has a different role in the dance. As you undertake this, remember that God’s commands always come in the context of a promised blessing. We sometimes murmur about His methods, thinking He plays it a little rough. But He is blessing us, not playing bean bag with us. You are a man. You are standing here as a man of God. So I charge you, as a minister of Jesus Christ, to seek God’s blessing on your marriage—today, tomorrow, and every day thereafter until God separates you by death. And it is good that you are a man because seeking God’s blessing in this world is a courageous act. But when you do, you will be astonished at the glory that flow from it.

Carrie, you are called to be Eddie’s glory. The writer of Proverbs says that a wife is the crown of her husband. The apostle Paul wonderfully says that the woman is the glory of man. These are not patronizing comments about “the little woman.” In fact, they are precisely the reverse of that. Those who like to pretend that the apostle Paul had a low view of women are proving nothing other than their own inability to read.

You are a crown; you are a glory. It is not an accident that you are the most glorious and glorified person here—radiant, beautiful, dressed in white. No glory in this sanctuary compares with you. This is no mere societal custom—it is a profound biblical truth. It is a parable, enacted before us. Years from now, when people look at pictures of your wedding, they will see Eddie—a nice guy in a rented tux—and they will see you, in all this resplendent glory. Why are you dressed so gloriously? Because the woman is the glory of the man. Embrace this truth; treasure it, and, for the rest of your life, learn more and more what it means.

Now many men have found themselves having to strive for a crown, but no one really wants to strive with a crown. In just a minute, when the vows are said, your life will have become his, and his life will have become yours. Always remember that God has broken your old way of life in order to replace it with a higher, deeper, richer form of life. If this is the glory at the beginning, what will the glory of the conclusion be? God is blessing you, and in blessing you He is blessing Eddie with your radiance. You are becoming his wife, you are becoming his crown. Sin and disobedience can interfere with this, but we know that the two of you will keep your vows, and this will not be the case. What kind of crown will you be? You will be a diadem, not a leaden weight.

In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, amen.