The Bible describes our triune God as one who keeps covenant. Not only does He keep covenant, but the Scripture says that He keeps covenant and mercy. In Deuteronomy, this wonderful truth is declared this way: “Know therefore that the Lord thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations” (Dt. 7:9). Something very similar is said in the first chapter of Nehemiah. “And said, I beseech thee, O Lord God of heaven, the great and terrible God, that keepeth covenant and mercy for them that love him and observe his commandments . . .” (Neh. 1:5).
We are gathered here today in order to establish a marriage covenant, and since we identify ourselves as followers of Christ, it is important for us to take our signals from Scripture as we do this. Making a covenant like this is not an arbitrary custom of ours, and it is not dependent for its existence on the laws or whims of mere men. Marriage is what it is because of the Word of God, and in turn, we must also say that covenants are what they are because of the very nature of God.
In Deuteronomy, before we are told that God keeps covenant, we are told that the Lord is God, and that He is the faithful God. What God does here (keep covenant) proceeds out of what kind of God He is. We see the same order in Nehemiah. Before we are told that God keeps covenant, we are told that He is the Lord God of heaven. Before we are given the grace of the promise, we are given the grace of a glimpse of what God is like — He is a great and terrible God. The God of the Bible is our Father, and He showers mercy upon us, generation after generation. But He does not do so as a cuddly god. He sings over His people with delight, but the song is not restricted to a mere lullaby.
Notice that He keeps covenant because of His faithfulness, not because of ours. We can tell this because He keeps covenant and mercy. This mercy means that our frailty and tendency toward failure is understood going into it. In the gospel God has through Christ kept the covenant perfectly for us. At the same time, it is not the case that our behavior is irrelevant — God does this it says for those who love Him and observe His commandments. But observing his commandments doesn’t presuppose absolute perfection — remember, He shows mercy — but it does presuppose that by faith alone we are going to be taking grateful advantage of the provisions made in the covenant for forgiveness of sin.
Now we are here to fashion a covenant, and you as a congregation are serving in an official capacity to witness the formation of this covenant union. This is a great occasion — solemn and joyful vows will be exchanged in just a moment, and we will all know that it has been done. Our triune God, the God of all covenants, is present here with us, and it delights Him to be here. We confess that this ceremony exhibits for us in a very real way what God is like.
These vows do not presuppose sinless perfection from this moment on, for either the groom or the bride. They are taken in a Christian context, which means that they presuppose the need for grace and forgiveness, extended in both directions. Of course. But at the same time, these vows do not allow for any wiggle room when it comes to the heart of the commitment being made.
So Daniel, just as covenant mercy proceeds to us from the heart of God, so also a sense of the nature of true faithfulness and mercy must come from you in order to pervade your new household. As God does with us, you are to take the initiative. The husband in Scripture is summoned to love his wife as Christ loved the Church. You are about to repeat words like better, worse, sickness, health, and so on. What this amounts to is that you are binding yourself here today with the cords of love, and committing yourself to love your wife when you feel like it and when you don’t feel like it. You are declaring that you will sacrifice yourself for her when it seems like a good idea and also when it doesn’t seem like such a hot idea. You may not grant this point most of the way; you must let go and grant it all the way. This is why I frequently say at weddings that the groom comes to die. But we serve a God who raises the dead, and your life together with Lydia will be that resurrection life. This too is what God is like. God is good to us in the gospel, because through it, He enables us to ask what He is like. He also enables us to answer the question, and to live out the answer. As you take up this new role, you want to live your life in this household so that at the last day your God-fearing Huguenot ancestors and your countless God-fearing descendants will all be able to say that Daniel Foucachon, ah, that Daniel, he was a “covenant and mercy” man.
Lydia, as he imitates Christ Daniel is called to sing quite a challenging song, and by the grace of God, as he vows so he will do. You are an accomplished musician, and so you may sympathize with the challenge he confronts. This is not a simple ditty—it is the song of creation, the song of redemption, the Song of Moses, and the Song of Christ. But your role here is not to rush in and do the singing for him, or alongside him. Neither should you settle for a role as a backup singer. The Bible says that the woman is the glory of the man, and as I want to use this image, this means you are the acoustical hall in which he sings. You are the context of the song, and the reason for it. You are to receive, reflect, echo, glorify, and then give it all back. Your role is therefore not passive.
Daniel, you initiate. Lydia, you respond. Daniel, you step forward and bow. Lydia, you reciprocate and curtsy. Daniel, you sacrifice in glory. Lydia, you glorify the sacrifice. Daniel, you are death. Lydia, you are resurrection. Daniel, you are the king. Lydia, you are the crown. Daniel, you are the singing of the song. Lydia, you are the hearing of the song. God is good to us in the gospel, and this new marriage will be a glorious embodiment of that gospel.
In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, amen.