NQN, Part Deux

Well, here it is, November once more. Many of you know the drill since I did this last year. But mark, you only know the drill if I do the same basic thing I did last year, which I intend to, but you didn’t necessarily know that, did you? And on top of that, some of you are new.

Here’s the deal. I do understand that I write provocatively from time to time. But there are different ways to be provocative. For example, there is the cudgeling style that might be employed by one of the Nephilim laying about him on every side with a Juvenalian quarter staff. There is no real nuance in that kind of mayhem. Then there is the little Horatian pinprick wound made by one of those dentistry tools, that thing with the little tiny wire on the end of it. That does have nuance and subtlety. My difficulty is that my tone—whenever I shift gears away from my standard oleaginous docility—is Horatian, and yet a number of people tend to mistake it for the quarter staff treatment.

So what I usually try to do is this. I (usually) know if something is going to go over big, and so I take care to pack, nice and tidy like, a number of disclaimers and qualifications early on in the piece, usually in the second paragraph. These anticipatory qualifications take care to inform the world that, “no, I don’t believe that all women are stupid,” for example. I have to make this kind of qualification because it is possible that I am about to maintain, in the course of my upcoming argument, that most men are taller than most women. This, naturally, opened me up to the charge of maintaining that all women are stupid. I try to anticipate such things, and disavow them beforehand.

Of course, with a certain class of critic this careful approach does not work at all. They blow right past my qualifications, as though they didn’t even exist. And then what have I done? I will tell you what that does. It exasperates those readers who have followed me for years, and who by this point could almost write my qualifications for me. These poor souls dance in place, they yell at the ceiling, they shake their forefinger at the computer screen, and all for naught. There I go again, qualifying my position, as though someone were reading carefully.

Except for November. This November, just like last November, I might as well be hanged for a sheep as for a lamb. I will just say what I think. I will not try to anticipate any blowbacky outrage, and I will not hedge any of my bets. But this is not really my version of Rand Paul’s celebration of Festivus, where he “airs his grievances.” No, the grievances are always aired. That part is dialed in over twelve months. What is new is that for one month I will treat my most hostile critics to one full month of confirmation bias. I will write me the way they read me. Will it make any difference? Not a bit, except to my friends, who have been telling me how much they are looking forward to November.

Now to some really important issues. Some might be interested in whether we damaged any furniture this year as we prepared ourselves to prepare you for this onslaught of verbs and nouns, and all with no qualifying adverbs and adjectives. And the answer to that question should become apparent today around 11 am Pacific. Stay tuned for that.

Also, like last year, Canon Press is going to be offering various sweet deals, and we moved tens of thousands of titles, which I will let you know about as we proceed.

And here is the update on today’s deal. If you want a free Kindle version of Rules for Reformers, go here. If you want the Audio and paperback at 50% off, you can go here. This particular deal is good for five days. Scurry over there now.

Thanks so much for joining us.