Picking a Basket of Novemberries

My husband recently listened to a podcast discussing the book ‘White Knights and Reviling Wives’ being published by the Ogdens. Afterward, he stated that if I were to misbehave or break something in anger, he would physically hit me / ‘beat me down’. To be clear, I’m not suggesting it would be appropriate for me to break objects simply to test his resolve, but I’m questioning whether his stance is at all biblical. Is it ever acceptable to physically harm one’s spouse outside the context of self-defense?

AA

I’ve been heartened by your ministry. It is an encouraging thought to ponder 57 Doug Wilson’s in Christendom. As it relates to Deborah in the Book of Judges, I wonder if there is an important distinction between raising our daughters to intentionally aspire to leadership in government and to simply be prepared to accept that responsibility should it come to them in this fallen world? A Christian woman should not aspire to be a single mother (some women do so) but she should have some preparation to respond if that trial fell to her. We should raise our daughters to be more fond of and seek to replicate godly women like Hannah and the healthy maternal instinct of having babies not the perceived power/status of a Deborah. It’s recognized in rare situations a Christian woman can fulfill both responsibilties (Christian Finnish Politician Paivi Rasanen). However, the priority should be to nurture and fulfill the maternal instinct. On a side note, might you consider doing a “Doug Reacts” to Allie Beth Stuckey’s performance in “Jubilee” in which she is surrounded by and debates 20 liberal Christians on hot topic social issues?
Blessings,

Doug

Recently came across an interaction between some folks who were running the good ol’ “Doug Wilson is a heretic who denies sola fide” schtick, and somewhere along the way they brought up your ordination (or rather, alleged lack thereof) as another point of contention. They asserted that you are self-ordained; I’m aware of your baptist congregational background, but I was wondering if, after moving into Presbyterianism, you did anything along the lines of having yourself examined by your session for ordination? Thanks in advance for satisfying my curiosity.

Luke

This is in regard to 57 Deborahs. Helen Andrews recently published an article on the feminization of social institutions which is being talked about; I think your articles are parallel in many ways, while being aimed at different things and proceeding from different starting-points. I would be interested in your thoughts.
Meanwhile, I think that a crisis of manhood is always going to be also a crisis of womanhood and childhood, but in complementary and non-identical ways (since men and women are complementary and non-identical). Jesus must be the definition of authentic manhood, but the church mediates Jesus to Christians and its witness to what that is is not neutral. I read somewhere recently that new/returning women churchgoers flock to megachurches (emotion, servant leadership, affirmation) and new/returning men find the most trad place they can (transcendence, beauty, obedience). All of which is to say that even in the church, Biblical patriarchy is an incredibly marginalized, parochial take. How much less will the world (or “conservatism” more generally) listen—I don’t think Helen Andrews will carry the day. If women are militating against men everywhere, including the church, and winning, well then this is the source of Fuentes and his groypers.
When a good point is made (like all your points in this article), it can be petty to object “well, what about this other related thing you didn’t mention?” But I really don’t think it’s fair to take men’s holiness failures and sense of resentment to task without also taking women’s holiness failures and sense of resentment to task. The world is evil and is trying to destroy women just as much as men, but it is destroying women by means of elevation and promotion, and destroying men in the mode of enervation and belittlement. Any solution has to address both together.
Conservatism is going to need to find a way to say “men, you are good, and we affirm you and celebrate you” and mean it. I think that when it can say that, and the message hits the coalition and permeates it, that will start to channel the groyper sense of resentment into something constructive and healing for them, socially and politically, and begin to eviscerate the toxicity you mention. I think there needs to be an initiative of grace there somehow, though. Otherwise, just moralizing at groypers to just “be better” to earn a wife, or to stop using porn (when they know that people on the Epstein list still occupy the halls of power) will sound to them like Pelagius telling them to earn their salvation, and they, realizing the futility, will fall into deeper and deeper ressentiment.
Thank you for your time.

Matthew

This question isn’t NQN related, but as I read through God in the Dock recently, I re-read some words of Lewis that always puzzle me: “I disliked very much their hymns, which I considered to be fifth-rate poems set to sixth-rate music.” Now he does qualify this and says he learned to appreciate them and the saints that honestly sang them, but it seems harsh to call Watts and Wesley fifth-rate poets and Bach a sixth-rate composer. Did he specifically have more saccharine hymns like “In The Garden” in mind? Has this bothered you as well, or what are your thoughts on why he had such a low view of the corporate gathering and hymnody?

Tim

This is not connected to a specific blogpost.
Thank you for your work, i am a student of theology in Germany.
I have a question concerning “real“ Applications.
You have sometimes talked about the modern fear of “real“ applications (Children should not go to the secular Kindergarten/school). I know and am convinced, that it was not like this in earlier times.
My question: How did past generations go about this? How can we do this, especially when our system is so radically different?
Thanks again!

Fred

Re: The Grace of White Privilege
Yes and amen, and also Noooo.
A privilege is an additional legal right above and beyond what is general, such as the right to hunt in the king’s forest.
All the things you described as privileges are actually just advantages.

Jennifer

So, having enjoyed every NQN, my curiosity just kicked in and I played the “Start a Fire” song that is in the background. I just can’t understand all the lyrics and a cursory Google (well, Duck-duck-go) search was unhelpful. Where might I find the lyrics?

David

When I read in “That Hideous Strength 10x” you mention if you’re faithful, “unattractive women hired by somebody will start showing up at your events” I had to laugh. After decades of following you I finally heard you in person at the Christ or Chaos DC event in September. I knew I was close to the venue but was assured when I saw “My Body My Choice” protesters out front. The next day it was the red dress ladies. I even found the parking garage by following more feminist signage. I guess it’d be called off-label use. Thank you for that conference. I loved every minute of it.

Elizabeth

I need your knowledgeable recommendation on the ‘next’ book for my almost 18 year old, HS senior grandson. As his grandmother, I have been praying for him-his personal walk with God, his choice of girls and how to choose the one, that God would make him to be a man after His own heart . . . There were girl problems in his life. I was shocked when his mother asked me what to do to help him. I ordered “Get the Girl” and hit send while we were talking. He has read the book. This is the text I received from his mom on his response “I’m almost done with the book meaux meaux got me, how do I get more?!” (Isn’t God amazing!) So I need a recommendation for the next book. He has accepted Jesus as His Savior and needs to know what a Godly man looks like. Please give me sequential recommendation for growth.
A side note: I “found” Blog & Mablog ” through a Spotify recommendation.
Kind regards,

Debbie

The right is simping for Sydney Sweeney (again). It seems that “Playboy Philosophy” may need to be added to that immolated horse of yours.

Notashlans

In your blog “That Hideous Strength 10X” near the end you have the following paragraph:
“But the go-along-get-along Christians remain adept with rationalizations. They can find academic dens and cubbies to hide away in, like Horton in Escondido or Hart at Hillsdale, and they will no doubt be up to the challenge of finding conservative Christians to be the actual threat.”
I know it is NQN, but I am genuinely curious who “Horton” and “Hart” are. Is that Michael Horton? I have found him to be excellent in the few things I have read from him. Is he up to no good now? I am not asking for a qualification in November, but maybe a link to something he has said/done/failed to do, etc. . . . Is there a beef with him I am not aware of? I do not know who “Hart” is at all, but would certainly be interested as well.

Tyler

Long time reader, first time writer. I am wanting your advice on a matter and I’ll try to keep it short. I am a late 20s married man with 3 young children. Earlier this year we resigned membership at our (small country community) church of 14 years after the pastor resigned and the powers that be decided it was time to be egalitarian and let women read Scripture from the pulpit and teach adult Sunday school classes. We have been visiting a more urban, Calvinistic/reformed Baptist church for several months that I became acquainted with thru their biblical counseling ministry. In almost every respect we fit in well and have no significant doctrinal disagreements. The problem is many people (women) dress in a way that I would consider immodest. Is it too much to ask that the elders adult daughter’s shirt should meet her pants in the family photo? I am readily willing to admit that lust is one of my besetting sins that I am fully responsible for, but come on. My problem is compounded in that I am a farmer in a rural area so I can often go all week without seeing a woman at all unless she drives by on the road, only to go to church and be confronted by an immodest sister in Christ. My question is—how big of an issue is this? Should I get over it and stay? Should I or my wife talk to someone in the church about it, and if so, who? Should this be grounds to look for another church? There are other Reformed churches around, but require a further drive than our current 35 minutes. Also, it’s not like there are a majority of women who do this, and I recognize that it will always be a potential problem unless I go back to my German Baptist heritage with a dress code. It’s not like a dress code can force modesty of the heart either. Thanks for your help.

Confused and a Little Hopeless

Wondered if you had any insight on college and dating. My daughter will be going to Liberty University next year. She’s dated two guys in her teenage years, and the way we handled dating was that the boys would have to come and have dinner with our family if they wanted to see her, and they could talk on the phone on occasion. Now that she is going to college, obviously we can’t do that. So, I wondered if you had any insight on how to guide her. Thanks for your availability Doug!!

B Sim

How can we battle unbelief? I’ve delved in presuppositional apologetics especially with Greg Bahnsen. I like to have answers to questions in case someone asks, but more so to answer my my own unbeliefs. I also am aware of your distinction between questions and doubts. A thought in my head is “What if God and Christianity are true, but God and us are a part of this overall simulation?” I’m sure there are other variations of this suggestion. I’m rattled by this suggestion. Is there a good answer to this, or would this be just considered a doubt and should be ignored?

Anon Anon

How should Christians solve legal disputes?
1) I’m an attorney who wants to apply 1 Corinthians 6 to my legal practice. I think one way of doing this is by having clients agree to “Christian Mediation/Conciliation” to resolve disputes. I know there are services like Relational Wisdom 360 associated Ken Sande which provide this type of service. Do you think Christians should use services like this?
2) Should the Church be creating an alternative legal system to our American system? Having recently read through the CREC’s Constitution, I see biblical principals being applied there around due process that are often lacking in our modern legal system, and I’ve heard to reference back to Old Testament law in a way I don’t know that Ken Sande would. Do you think it is proper for the Church, or a denomination (like the CREC, maybe) to provide services like this to Christians who want to resolve disputes according to a biblical system of justice (and I mean the whole Bible here)? If so, do you think Pastors or Elders should be the ones to resolve “civil” disputes? Or is this something Christians should be doing, but not under the banner of the Church?
Thoughts welcomed.

Ken

Thank you for being the evangelical equivalent of wasabi paste on a toothbrush. We all need it.
After this recent election everyone seems to be trying to figure out the root causes of “the way we are as a society.” I’ve seen blame laid at the feet of Vietnam draft dodgers and their fathers. Marx probably deserves a fair portion of the blame he gets. And the people who gave us the Scapegoat are unfairly maligned.
But, following your lead, I can see everything coming out of the song of Moses in Deuteronomy 32. So my question: What resources would you recommend for this study of that great book of Moses? I grew up thinking the book of Revelation was the interpreter of the times, but now I’m pretty sure it’s Deuteronomy.

John

About your recent shot against the scary science egg stuff
Doug, were the Nephilim made in the image of God?
At what point is something not a human, and if ever, something to be detested…
I mean let’s just say at some point we have a real deal Minotaur scenario, as in with animals. plus grown in a lab with gene mods, and at this rate AI involved . . . what principles can we use as handles here. I’m afraid I’m 50 years I’m going to be missing your gentle cultural commentary.

Logan

You’ve been on quite a tour of the podcast circuit lately. We’ve been praying for Bari Weiss for years since she started her company and podcast. She was raised in a Jewish home by parents who used Dobson’s parenting book, and despite being in a mirage with a woman, has had so many people witness to her in public on her podcast over the years, the Spirit is clearly at work.
You’re also both in the coveted club of being secret Mossad agents. So when are we getting Man Rampant with Bari Weiss?

GJ

How would you counsel a young father to inculcate masculinity in his sons when he lacks many of the traditional traits identified with masculinity?
My family of five lives in an apartment so I don’t have a property to cultivate and my father taught me very little about cars, building things, barbecuing, and whatever other manly stereotypes you can think of. I’ve never been in a real fight outside of quick scuffles on the playground quickly broken up. I often feel like a second-rate man because of it.
I know that is a superficial way to grade masculinity because the glad assumption of sacrificial responsibility is how you define it. However, the superficial aspects of manliness aren’t completely unimportant, right?
Can you help?

Keagan

I have been taught that scripture is clear and self-authenticating. I have recently encountered Eastern Orthodox people, however, and one of their counters to Protestantism is that history demonstrates interpretations of Scripture fracturing endlessly, with every new denomination asserting its own confession as the faithful interpreter. If a denomination’s authority rests only on the consent of its members, is that really an authority at all—or simply a temporary interpretive club? Meanwhile, Orthodoxy claims a continuous interpretive body that doesn’t reinvent itself with every dispute. How does sola Scriptura defend itself against infinite splintering without becoming an appeal to tradition by another name?

Rose

I want to pick your mind on this. If a minister/pastor commits a sexual sin, he is disqualified from ministry, no surprise there.
My question is on one who might be called to ministry but is unsure. During his Christian journey, he has committed countless sexual sins. Does that alone disqualify him for ministry despite being only a potential pastor.
Thanks

Dionysus

I have followed your content for years and have drawn great value from your writings. My family and I have been very blessed by you, especially your writing on family. I pray the Lord continues to give you many more fruitful years.
With all that said, your recent behavior has been confusing at best.
For one, I am struggling to fully understand the “Trojan horse” in your recent NQN video. The horse was named “respectability,” which I think we can all agree can indeed act as a Trojan horse. Many of the items listed on the side of the horse seem to follow this pattern—they appear respectable but are actually toxic (for example, the Hewlett Foundation or Hallmark movies).
That said, “far right fartulence” does not seem to fit this pattern. If by “far right fartulence” you mean the kind of patriarchy and antisemitism you critiqued in your first NQN article, these positions do not present themselves as “respectable” in the first place. The “respectable” thing to do would be to publicly distance yourself from these things, which you have done.
Even more ironic is your discussion of William Buckley in your Doug & Friends video. You mention that Buckley’s handling of Buchanan caused you to “lose some respect” for him. Yet Buckley’s approach seemed very much in the spirit of “respectability,” seemingly distancing himself from what he deemed “far right fartulence.” Again, is this not what you have done as well?

John

I googled the author of the the ‘beast and the woman’ book, because at first I thought it had to be AI. Shocked to find it’s a real thing. This author has many books. In each book, the man is always a beast and the woman is still a woman. Why is this? Does this reveal something about how men vs women are both depraved, but differently? Also, is this different than old works like Beauty and the Beast?

Roger

Today I had something occur to me. I was listening to some music while working. The song “Every Now and Then” by Garth Brooks came on. While listening my mind went to a miscarriage my wife had between our first and second children. Neither of us was ready for that. A DNC was performed. I was not a mature enough man or husband to realize I should have been with my wife for the procedure. We both believe that child would have been our first son. We have no medical evidence for that as it was too early in the pregnancy to know.
My question to you, should we, as Christians, have funerals or burials for miscarried children?
I believe life begins at conception, both scripturally and scientifically. If that is true then where are my son’s remains? I believe he is in the presence of our LORD spiritually. Physically, however, I believe I have failed my son. Any counsel on this matter would be greatly appreciated. Thank You.
Very respectfully,

Austin

I have been married for over a decade and have a gaggle of little ones. I will be unspecific, but I have a job as the leader of an organization. I have had jobs on and off throughout my marriage, all of which I have taken, admittedly, to impress/submit to my husband who is much more delighted with me being a successful boss/business woman than being a homemaker. I have occasionally crashed out and wriggled out of jobs and had stints of staying home, and those times have been a delight beyond belief. I love homemaking and have a real heart for it. With the job I have now, I am frazzled at home, always behind, always messy, and barely hanging on. I am good at my job, and a natural leader, and this impresses my husband. He doesn’t mind a pizza brought home on a day I’ve been working hard, but I do. However, he does get agitated when I can’t help him with things on a whim because I’m busy doing my job. The expectation is for me to be available to him to help with his work, and to fit my job, child rearing, and my home keeping in the cracks. I am also the primary caregiver and expected to pick up the kids from school, help with their homework, and make supper all while working a full time job.
I miss my kids, who are at school during the day. I have to let them run amok when they’re home more than I would like so I can finish work tasks. I ache to work in my home and clean a bathroom without guilt that I’m missing a deadline. I want to be available to my husband and for him to see that the blessing lies there, and not in girl bossery. We do not have church leadership that could counsel us at this time. I’m stumped, and I am thoroughly wrung dry. Even reading my Bible gives me severe guilt, because there are 400 things I need to be doing at any given moment. As you can imagine, this strains romance and my patience . . . and I would love a minute to maybe go for a walk now and then!
I would love some very practical advice on how a wife can be in a position of submission and be a help meet, when the expectations are also for her to be a leader in business outside the home and her heart for home making is not respected as valuable in the way she would hope. How does one submit without bitterness in a situation that feels exploitative and leaves one with daily heartache and anxiety?

Home Sick

Additional advice for Robert from the letters this week—he is pursuing a woman who respects him but “doesn’t have romantic feelings for him.” I would encourage him (or ask a trusted male friend) to honestly assess his own physical fitness and appearance. As a woman, her comments seem like a kind way of hinting perhaps he could improve his health or physical appearance, which isn’t necessarily an easy fix but definitely straightforward and achievable with effort.

Mrs. D

Your statement [my paraphrase] if you had to sum up Christian Nationalism into what you called “one nugget:” “I want America to stop making God mad.” I agree with this, and I believe I understand what you’re saying. I come from a fundamental independent Baptist background and we said this all the time, calling it “patriotism” rather than “nationalism,” but I wondered what your response would be if the follow-up question was, “What about Divine impassibility?” (Btw, thanks for all the free books and content during NQN each year. They are tremendously appreciated.)

Bernard