Marriage is one of the great gifts of God and, as with all His gifts, it must be received by faith. Not only must it be received by faith, it must be received by faith alone.
This is a truth that we may view from various angles. For example, in Ephesians 5, marriage is set forth as an embodiment of the gospel itself—husband and wife model for the world the meaning of Christ and the Church, which is of course the gospel. Husbands are told to love their wives, as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her. There is the gospel, there is the blood, there is the love of God that died and rose for us. And because we are to receive the gospel by faith alone, we do not proclaim the gospel through our marriages accurately if we do not receive them by faith alone.
Second, we are creatures, and we are utterly dependent upon the grace of God in everything. This is true with every morsel of food, every breath, every sunrise, every kind gesture. God sustains us all the time, constantly, every moment. So our only appropriate response to Him is faith, trust, complete rest. This is true, by the nature of the case in all things, and it is therefore true in our marriages.
The third reason for saying this is found explicitly in the text I have just referred to—Ephesians 5. In the 26th verse, Paul says that Christ cleanses and sanctifies the Church with the “washing of water by the word.” Here the Word is applied to the Church by Christ, and we read in Scripture, from Genesis to Revelation, that that declared Word of God is always to be received by faith. There are only two possibilities—faith and unbelief. This means that there is only one righteous possibility, which is faith. Faith in God, faith in His Word, faith alone, and faith all the way down.
Husbands are told to love their wives in just that same way, which means that wives are to respond appropriately. And all this means that husband and wife both hear the Word, and respond in faith. If we just respond, we will fall into legalisms. If we don’t respond, we are disobedient. But if we respond in faith, we will discover that God’s power and authority come to us along with His Word.
What happens then? The word that the Scriptures use to talk about this is glory. As John Piper has reminded us, God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. And we are most satisfied in Him when we believe what He says.
God says that a man is the glory of God. Do we believe Him? God says that a wife is the glory of her husband (1 Cor. 11:7). Do we believe Him? The Scriptures say that a virtuous wife is worth more than rubies (Prov. 31:10)—and they are not rubies locked away in a safe box either. They are rubies in a crown (Prov. 12:4), and a crown brings the weight of glory.
Scripture says that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen (Heb. 11:1). When God summons us to a life of faith, we are always invited up. We are not challenged to believe things that we all already assumed anyway.
Now Caleb and Katie, you are both very happy to be here. You are delighted with where you are, as are the rest of us. But here is the word I want to leave with you, as you begin trusting God in your lives together. God is the perfect Father. This means, among other things, that He is ridiculously easy to please, and impossibly difficult to satisfy. He is here with us today, and He rejoices with us. He is delighted with us. Your hearts are full and overflowing, and that is how He designed it to work.
But never forget that He is the only guest at this wedding who fully knows the glory that is awaiting us all. He is the only one who has laid out the everlasting counsels, knowing that not one iota of His decrees will fail. Your hearts will always be full and overflowing, but in the days and weeks to come, in the years and aeons before us, your hearts will be continually enlarged. Do you believe this?
He is delighted right now, and He will always be delighted with those who respond to Him in faith. He will always be delighted right now. But at the same time, those who respond to Him in faith will always have an eternity before them, in which they can continue to grow up into His glory, and we are never going to get to the end of it. He will never be satisfied because He will always have something more to give to us.
Now it is the glorious task of men and women, husbands and wives, to enact and embody something of what this will be like. “For we preach not ourselves, but Christ Jesus the Lord; and ourselves your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us” (2 Cor. 4:5-7).
There it is. The glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ resides in earthen vessels. Your marriage, being established here today, is an earthen vessel, a clay pot. And God is placing an unspeakably valuable treasure in it. Jesus Christ is here, and He is not going to leave. You will be tempted at times to just see the weakness, to understand the frailty, to be aware of all the foibles. When that happens, remember that the treasure is there, the glory is there. When you remember that, what is it? It is faith, and we live by faith alone.
Caleb, in just a moment you are going to enter into a covenant of glory. You are about to die so that God can raise you in glory. This gospel glory is never grasped—when men try that, it just slips away from them. This kind of glory is always given. You believe, you rest, you trust, and God astonishes you. And you will discover that when God increases and multiplies your glory, He will do it by making your wife increasingly radiant. She is your glory, and so God gives you glory by giving someone else glory. But that’s all right with you because she is your body, bone of your bone, flesh of your flesh. This is a great mystery, but Paul is pointing to Christ and the Church through it, and as more and more husbands start to believe him, we will see more and more marriages pointing to that same gospel.
Katie, in just a moment you will be accepting a gift. It will be a gift from God, and from His instrument and servant Caleb. Your charge today is to receive it in faith, which means that you are to accept this kindness completely. Do not hold anything in reserve. This is what will enable you to take what Caleb gives, turn it over in your hands, adorn it, and give it back to him glorified. This will be true in everything, in small things and in great things. You will adorn paychecks by turning them into glorious meals. You will adorn his love for you with children. You will adorn his table with flowers.
Caleb, you will be a head that wears a crown of glory—by faith. Katie, you will be that crown—by faith. The two of you will be together, but it will all be by faith alone.
In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, amen.