“At thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore” (Ps. 16: 11)
The Basket Case Chronicles #62
“The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife” (1 Cor. 7:4).
Here is another reason for recognizing that Paul did not give the advice found in v. 1 because he was sexually uptight or repressed in any way. He was concerned about the impending distress (v. 26), but was very realistic about the human frame. Sex is not really optional (v. 2).
Having urged marriage as a remedy for fornication, he now urges men and women to adopt the mindset that would make ongoing application of that remedy a possibility. What he teaches here is reciprocity of sexual authority. The wife does not own her own body, but the authority over it (exousia) belongs to her husband. This by itself would reduce marriage to a lower form of concubinage, but Paul does not stop there. The same authority that a man has over a woman sexually is an authority that she may wield over him. Sexual authority is reciprocal.
They can have this mutual authority in a workable way only because God has authority over the whole thing. For example, we learn (v. 5) that this authority has limits—a man and wife do not get to combine their authority and decided to separate sexually for extended periods of time—whether from misguided asceticism or mutual resentments. It doesn’t matter. Married couples are called by God to act like married couples.
This does not mean that there should be “due benevolence” negotiations, like it was a business deal, but it does mean that there should be some conversations about it.