And Not Like Jake Blues on His Knees

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What do belief in evolution, belief in global warming, and belief in the possibility of space aliens who subscribe to a blue state recycling ethos all have in common? Well, they are all attested by Science, you rube.

I am pleased to say that I made it all the way through this article without wheezing once.

Chesterton said that the hotheads of the French Revolution appealed to the goddess Reason, which was odd, because it would appear that this was the goddess who had smiled upon them least. Cornlius Van Til pointed out the pendulum swing nature of unbelief (which is constant), but which swings back and forth between rationalism and irrationalism, like the clock on the wall. The apostle Paul said that divine judgment consists of God giving men up to the futility of intellectual kleenex fires (Rom 1:21,28). Vain imaginations about sums it up.

I had a friend once who, when he was a boy, was taken by his father for a tour of skid row. His father, who was not yet then a believer, wanted his son to see consequences that come from certain choices. I thought of that, more than once, during the course of my study of  philosophy. I thought that the unbelieving Academy ought to be treated more like an intellectual skid row, and less like a haven for “Brights,” to use the howl-worthy Dawkins moniker. Fathers ought to take their sons for a walk through all the smart people departments, and ought to finish with a stern warning, when they are out in the car about to head home, that if the son doesn’t play outside more, and if he decides not to try out for the football team, this could happen to him.

Evolution is not just wrong, but is also risible. Malcolm Muggeridge put it well when he said that in retrospect, it will be shown to have been one of the great jokes of history. But, someone sputters, “Science! Science! Knowledge! Education!” and I would simply reply that such incantations don’t work anymore. And the climate change harum scarum is worse, because it is simultaneously silly and a naked power grab. Because they were starting to lose us on all that “the planet’s gonna boil!” stuff — because chilly facts were coming down upon us like one of Al Gore’s unfortunate snowstorms, and we already had six inch accummulation — it became necessary to introduce the alien motif. We ought to recycle because aliens might see how fast our atmosphere is heating up and undertake a preemptive invasion. Really? And also Santa Claus might see you not recycling. Don’t forget the naughty and nice argument. That’s an important one.

You know, a scientist ought to hypothesize in the calm of his laboratory, with books and experiments and stuff, and not like Jake Blues on his knees in front of his jilted girlfriend.

Anyone who knows anything about it knows that real scientists are willing to engage, and are willing to debate the big issues. Those who just shout you down as a heretic are only showing how far away from the spirit of free inquiry they actually are. Torquemada was not one of twelve disciples, or one of the early church fathers. He was the poster child of the whole enterprise gone completely to seed. In the same way, just as the Christian Church desperately needed her Reformation, so also does the whole realm of Science. A scientific reformation would cull from the scientific ranks all the powermongers, politicians, shamans, the high-speed computer modeling fact-maker-uppers, and space alien movie screenplay writers. How about it then? Where is our scientist Luther?



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