The Science is Settled

So, then, record snow storms in all kinds of odd places. Evidence for melting Himalayan glaciers . . . melts. The culprits were caught cooking the books. The guy at the center of that controversy now admits that nothing has been warming since 1995, and beside, they lost a bunch of papers, with evidence n’ stuff.

So then, please permit me to announce that global warming is over, and climate change is also over. The weather continues on, but that’s okay. It always does that. What does this mean? It means the science is settled! Let the healing begin!

Can we keep our old light bulbs? The weird glow from those new ones would bring my gray head down to the grave in sorrow.