The Night Before Whatsit

Sharing Options

So here is some festive doggerel I wrote some time ago, and which I periodically post at appropriate times of the year — and now it is the turn of 2017. Have a merry Christmas. Comments are open, but only if you want to say merry Christmas back.Christmas Eve Tree

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the land,
We still mark the birth of the One who is banned
From public discussion or public display.
“Get rid of the Christ child–but still keep the day!”

So public school children must practice with stealth
Those carols which threaten our strange commonwealth,
And now and again someone’s runaway creche
Will abruptly appear in some government place,
Right out in the open where children can view
This threat to the folks at the ACLU.

So drink to the health of our once happy nation,
And deck all the halls with strange litigation.
Then eat all you want to, drink rum by the quart
But don’t say that name, or you’ll wind up in court.

Pretend that this holiday just always was.
Don’t ask whence it came like a smart child does.
Just talk about Rudolph or Santa’s small elves,
Or sing little ditties of days bunched in twelves.
Now this is all right because (please get this straight)
There’s no separation of North Pole and state.

So sing all you want of this sort of stuff
In the public arena, folks can’t get enough.
If you do sing the carols, then please, just be careful.
Look over your shoulder, keep watch and be prayerful.
Edit those carols, avoid our law’s curses,
(You’ll have to leave out quite a few of the verses.)
So you won’t get the secular humanists riled
With songs about sinners and God reconciled.
“Be near me Lord Jesus, I ask Thee to stay,”
Angers the People for the Humanist Way.

But if you believe the time is now ripe
To stand up for Christmas, don’t sit there and gripe.
The secular Scrooges and Grinches will hear
If you say, “Merry Christmas,” with all the right cheer.
It’s time to be counted for what’s good and right,
To all, Merry Christmas! To all, a good night!

Subscribe
Notify of
guest
48 Comments
Oldest
Newest
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
"A" dad
"A" dad
8 years ago

Merry Christmas! Blog and Mablog!

Rob Steele
Rob Steele
8 years ago

Happy Amazon Day!

D. D. Douglas
D. D. Douglas
8 years ago

Doug, thank you for your ministry to us Partakers In The Heavenly Calling (Heb. 3:1).

40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
8 years ago

How long before John Piper starts writing articles that say that, yes, we do have the legal right to wish others Merry Christmas, but does that make it the best choice? What if you accidentally wish a Jihadi Muslim or Ultra-Orthodox Jew Merry Christmas, they’re so offended that they try to kill you, and a cop has to shoot them, and they die and burn in hell forever? Do you really want to risk something like that? Let’s concentrate on really loving Jesus, instead of paying him lip service by mouthing pious platitudes this time of year. Say Happy Holidays… Read more »

Ian Miller
8 years ago

You may disagree with Piper on his social policies, his theology, or his chosen neighborhood – but he is radically centered on Jesus Christ, and would never suggest hiding a passion for celebrating Christ in any way. This comment is utterly ridiculous.

40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
8 years ago
Reply to  Ian Miller

Right. When his church refused to take a stand on a proposed law banning gay marriage, that was in no way whatsoever hiding a passion for celebrating Christ.

You’re right; he’s nuthin’ but a bold, fearless, prophet o’ God.

Ian Miller
8 years ago

He has always taken a firm stand on opposing official church positions on specific laws or candidates. I don’t see how anyone could actually listen to anything he’s said about abortion or gay marriage and think he is anywhere close to supporting the false “rights” to those activities. Supporting separation of church and state does not mean supporting everything the state does.

But, of course, you’re not interested in listening to what he says. You’re interested in a pastor who checks off the boxes that you consider “good.”

40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
8 years ago
Reply to  Ian Miller

John Piper believes churches shouldn’t oppose gay marriage because he thinks that would violate the separation of church and state?

That’s not true. The separation of church and state is a red herring, an excuse for desperately trying to avoid being perceived as a church that’s “not nice.”

Ian Miller
8 years ago

He believes churches shouldn’t tell their members that they must vote a certain way. He has never stopped opposing the lie of gay marriage.

40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
8 years ago
Reply to  Ian Miller

He believes churches shouldn’t tell their members that they must vote a certain way.

No, he doesn’t. He believes churches shouldn’t tell their members that they must vote a certain way on certain topics. On other topics, he’s all for churches taking positions on proposed laws.

You seem to think you’re some sort of expert on John Piper, but you’re not aware that he has spent decades praising the Christian ministers of the Civil Rights Movement for using their pulpits to seek changes in laws, and to urge people to vote for those changes?

Ian Miller
8 years ago

I sat under John Piper’s sermons for approximately 14 years every Sunday. I do not recall a single time he ever said, “You should vote for this or that law or candidate.” He has, however, always said that certain issues are very clear to him personally in terms of what to vote.

Do you have a specific law or candidate where you believe he has disregarded the separation between church and state?

40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
8 years ago
Reply to  Ian Miller

Yes. An entire book. Bloodlines. You may have heard of it. Much of it praises Martin Luther King and other ministers who led the Civil Rights Movement. They didn’t just march; they preached from their pulpits that laws against interracial marriage and interracial social equality were unbiblical and had to be overturned. And Piper praises the movement. No separation of church and state for them or for John Piper when it comes to the Civil Rights movement. You say you sat under his preaching nearly every Sunday for close to 14 years. And that he regularly denounced abortion and gay… Read more »

Ian Miller
8 years ago

I’ve read Bloodlines. An approval of a historical movement isn’t anywhere close to the same as saying, “You, church members under my authority right now, you must vote for this candidate or law or be out of fellowship.”

40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
40 ACRES & A KARDASHIAN
8 years ago
Reply to  Ian Miller

He didn’t merely “approve” of the Civil Rights Movement. He whole-heartedly endorses it, and considers it one of the greatest things that have happened since the nation was founded, and would probably say it’s one of the greatest things in the history of Western Civilization. You can’t say he whole-heartedly approves of a movement that obliterated the separation of church and state while at the same time insisting that the separation of church and state is extremely important to him. You say you sat under his preaching nearly every Sunday for close to 14 years. And that he regularly denounced… Read more »

ArwenB
ArwenB
6 years ago

Merry Christmas to 40 acres and Ian Miller, even though you can’t read instructions.

And definitely a Merry Christmas to the blogmaster and other commenters!

The Commenter Formerly Known As fp
The Commenter Formerly Known As fp
6 years ago
Reply to  ArwenB

ArwenB, it looks like those comments are from almost two years ago.

At any rate, since I identify as black today, I would like to take this occasion to wish everyone a Merry Kwanzaa! Or is that “Happy Kwanzaa”?

Christopher Casey
Christopher Casey
8 years ago

“How long before John Piper starts writing articles that say that, yes, we do have the legal right to wish others Merry Christmas, but does that make it the best choice?” About 30 years minimum.

Jerrod Arnold
Jerrod Arnold
8 years ago

Bro….I highly encourage you to go drink some eggnog. Merry χ-Mas. :-)

reformed roy
reformed roy
6 years ago
Reply to  Jerrod Arnold

JA may be selling 40 a bit short.

Jill Smith
Jill Smith
6 years ago

Wherever you may be, 40 Acres, Merry Christmas to you and yours!

Rick Davis
Rick Davis
8 years ago

So Doug posts a Christmas poem, and before long we’re back to John Piper and Natalie. Oh, Internet!

I thought the poem was funny though. Merry Christmas!

Benjamin Bowman
8 years ago

Douglas Wilson is what I imagine Huck Finn would be like if he had become a Christian and grown up.

Chadd
Chadd
6 years ago

Merry Christmas!

Kevin
Kevin
6 years ago

Merry Christmas!

Jill Smith
Jill Smith
6 years ago

Merry Christmas to everyone!

soylentg
soylentg
6 years ago

Merry Christmas to all! (and especially to our host, who continues to be edifying year by year)

Johnny Simmons
Johnny Simmons
6 years ago

Merry Christmas to all! Remember, it’s twelve days, so NO SLACKING! I know Mabloggers know how to party.

ron
ron
6 years ago

Merry Christmas to all,
And to all the Gospel of Truth!

Christopher
Christopher
6 years ago

Merry Christmas everybody!

Ken B
Ken B
6 years ago

Merry Christmas to all and sundry – but shouldn’t this post have been done at the beginning of October … ?

Dave
Dave
6 years ago

Merry Christmas!

Parko Polo
Parko Polo
6 years ago

Merry Christmas y’all!

Shawnhuxley
Shawnhuxley
6 years ago

Merry Christmas!

Justin Parris
Justin Parris
6 years ago

I’ll steal the phrasing I heard from another today.

Merry Christmas. If you don’t celebrate Christmas, merry Christmas anyway. Just because it’s a normal day to you doesn’t mean I shouldn’t wish for it to be a good one.

To any friends I’ve been missing since the Omega of the comment section, feel free to look me up on Facebook.

Rick Davis
Rick Davis
6 years ago
Reply to  Justin Parris

Much more magnanimous than Hilaire Belloc’s Christmas wishes.

“…I pray good beef and I pray good beer
This holy night of all the year,
But I pray detestable drink to them
That give no honour to Bethlehem…

:)

Justin Parris
Justin Parris
6 years ago
Reply to  Rick Davis

The phrasing I gave I heard while watching an online stream of a professional Super Mario Bros. player (Yes, I’m that nerdy). The words stuck out to me because that crowd’s culture is pretty saturated with hardcore progressive communist evil. The idea of celebrating Christmas without apology sticks out quite a bit in that context.

Melody
Melody
6 years ago

MERRY, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

John Callaghan
John Callaghan
6 years ago

Felix Dies Nativitatis!

Or, the same in more modern tongues:

‘Merry Christmas’ in European languages

kyriosity
kyriosity
6 years ago

“I’ll tell you what Christmas is really about,”
Pipes up some uncultured Neanderthal lout.
“Today is a birthday — the true Son of God’s”
And the worldlywise break down with howling fantods.